Thief-
Would it have made a difference, if I had followed
through with it? If I had arrived, unannounced and unexpected, surely dressed
to kill? Your mother, your family, none of you ever cared to discern the
reasons I ruined our love, never bothered to hold you accountable for your
devious nature...would it really have mattered, me being present to witness
your promise to another? Doubtful. Doubtful because I would never have left my
vehicle, no one would ever remember me even arriving...my acknowledgement would
be made from a distance, making no difference to anyone but me.
You see, Thief, your sincerity is revered, and your
declarations tend to be puzzling, but all the same, a person must be allowed
their own destruction. Obviously, I would never declare your wedding to be some
form of destruction, but your concept of life and love certainly destroyed
itself long before you came to the alter in the hands of your husband-to-be. Do
not be quick to judge, either, there is no jealousy between us, there is only
honesty and veneration for the individual who allowed me into her life for a
short period of time...it is my sincere belief that character once meant a
great deal more to others, even complete strangers, than it does now. Our
society has indeed destroyed itself for nothing they can remember, though that
is a discussion for another time.
There is patience in this, in writing, which
delivers me beyond the perception or reputation I leave for myself in the minds
of others. The idea that I can do no wrong, that life is a clever fight, a
chess game where style counts for as much as the checkmate. You never thought
so, Thief, I remember well, my character suffered for the immature tendencies
of my youth and simply for the fact we were both in the right or wrong place,
at the right or wrong time. Our opinions have differed on this, depending on
when or where we have responded...
I apologize for the cynicism. In part.
I do not intend to pursue your happiness, I assure
you. Too much has changed and for this, I truly am sorry. I am sorry, Thief.
-Tony
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